New Stuff: “Brookzill”

Dearest earbudders, while we wait for Digable Planets to get on the good foot and make a comeback, member Ladybug Mecca has preoccupied herself with DJ/Producer king Prince Paul, collaborating in a group called Brookzill (“Brooklyn and Brazil”). Combining Afro-Brazilian rhythms, hip hop, jazz, and all around good stuffs, this is a band I am seriously looking forward to listening to when their album drops October 7th. While we wait for this already predicted musical masterpiece, check out their first single, “Saudade Songbook” with Count Bass D. My ears are excited.


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First Podcast of 2013. Dance Like No One is Watching.

Happy New Year my musical heathens.

I trust the new year was good to you. I have returned with the first poddy of 2013. 2012 was such a blur, but I am here to provide you with some good tunes to make you shake your bon diggity bon and keep the party moving, if only for a little while.

I decided to make my first poddy of the year a dance show. It’s a compilation of some of my favorite dance tracks as of late. Some new, some old, but rest assured people will not sit still while playing this show. So if you haven’t gone to the bathroom, I suggest you do so.. unplug the phone, put the phone on vibrate, and enjoy for an hour or so..


As usual, download it here:


Stream it here:


Here is the rundown. Enjoy.



Spectrum – Zedd

Nightlife – Green Day

Hanging On (ft. Tinie Tempah) – Ellie Goulding

Video – Morgan Page & Tegan and Sara

History Repeating – Propellerheads

Timebomb (Extended Version) – Kylie Minogue

Indestructible – Robyn

Only Love Can Break Your Heart –  I Blame Coco

Don’t Nobody feat. N’Dea Davenport – Fred Everything

Push And Shove – No Doubt

Night Crawler – Jack Fell Down

Why (Hot Toddy Boogiefied Mix) – Joey Negro

I Can’t Stop – Doctor P & Flux Pavilion

No One Knows Who We Are – Kaskade & Swanky Tunes

Better Than Love – Hurts

I Know I Want You – Jett

No Way Down – Air France

Shock to Your System – Tegan and Sara



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Blogging is Fundamental: And so is the list of 2011 Top 30 Albums

Well this has been QUITE a rollercoaster of a year for music. Dance music was HUGE, indie acts crossed over, and rap..still sucked. But there were a few gems that slipped through the incredibly thin cracks. All in all, this was a great year for music. My ears for the most part were pleased, and so were my speakers whenever I played something with heavy basslines. Overall I give the year a B+. Now some of you will completely disagree with my choices. That’s fine. Some of you might not have even HEARD of these bands. And that’s what I’m here for I believe. So expand the mind a little will ya? So buckle up and hold on for a random, random list..While I am not a writer by any stretch of the imagination, I follow my tapping feet and my shaking booty. They lead the way. So sit back, relax, and rant and rave or smile at my choices. Don’t worry, you won’t be quizzed on this later.

30. Niki and the Dove – The Drummer

While this is just an EP it packs quite a wallop truth be told. Swedes do it best it seems and the trio provides a loud pulsating sound that grabs onto you and puts you in a trance and throws in a little r&b for gits and shiggles. You don’t know which way to go all you know is you want them to lead the dance way.

Key Tracks – The Drummer, Last Night


29. Pack A.D. – Unpersons

This album really blew me away. With a combination of rock and blues, they are definitely the quinticential garage band’s garage band. You can easily hear The White Stripe’s influence, as well as Flat Duo Jets with the growls and and the hollers. What else do you do when the relationship goes down the drain? Sing the pain away and get your growl on. Seek your revenge. Call the person out. Make the rock loud. And they did all of the above. You break up with someone? Put this album on. I guarantee you will feel better.

Key Tracks – Haunt You, Rid of Me, Seasick


28. Blood Oranges – Coastal Grooves

I don’t know much about Dev Hynes other than he loves rhythmic melodies and is completely influenced by 80s dance and new wave. It’s got great guitar lines and his voice is strong. It’s a cd that can be played after winding down after clubbing. It can be played in your car, or even at a party. Dev does most of the guitar strumming and a wonderful player he is. The music is clean and fun. And sometimes after the day is done, that’s all we need, something fun.

Key Tracks – Champagne Coast, Instantly Blank (The Goodness), I’m Sorry We Lied


27. Luke Bryan – Tailgates and Tanlines

While I’m not a big fan of country, there is usually an artist in the country department that makes the list for me. Luke Bryan, in addition to being easy on the eyes, has concocted a perfect pop country album. There is nothing particularly earth shattering about this album, but what he does he does well, just providing melodic country music that sticks with you and gets the feet tapping.

Key Tracks – Country Girl (Shake it For me), I Don’t Want This Night to End, Harvest Time


26. Mint Julip – Save Your Season

This album is difficult to discuss. The music is incredibly haunting. And incredibly mismatched. One minute you want to dance on the table and the next you want to..well.. hug someone followed by a “I love you man.” It’s just a great sounding record. Just listen for yourself.

Key Tracks – Days Go By, Save Your Season, Letting Go


25. The Kooks – Junk of the Heart

This is anything but junk. It’s kind of different from their previous albums. It sounds a bit more mainstream, but that’s not a bad thing at all. They’re not reinventing the wheel, they just want to make a good album you can listen to again and again. So far, no complaints here.

Key Tracks – Mr. Nice Guy, Taking Pictures of You, Is It Me


24. Foster the People – Torches

Ok, Pumped Up Kicks aside, this is an EXCELLENT record. Absolutely. It’s upbeat. It’s quirky, and gets my toes tapping. I mean, what else do you need? And it’s got piano. They make piano sound cool. Heck yeah!

Key Tracks – I Would Do Anything for You, Don’t Stop, Miss You


23. Mister Heavenly – Out of Love

Melodic harmonies, hard rock, and yet kinda sounds like it could be played in the 50s. I even detect a wee bit of the rockabilly. I was thoroughly surprised. The band is made up of members of Modest Mouse, the Shins, Man Man, and Unicorns. I guess with that cosmic slop, I should have known it was going to be good.

Key Tracks – Harm You, Charlyne, Doom Wop


22. Penguin Prison – Penguin Prison

Just makes me wanna dance dance dance. For reals. The new wave pays a visit. Synths, done in the right way, can really make an album stellar. And this.. was done in the right way.

Key Tracks – Don’t Fuck with My Money, Something I’m Not, Pinocchio


21. The Kills – Blood Pressures

Listening to this band makes me OWN blood pressure go up. It’s very loud, dark, and dirty. Just plain dirty.. with a hint of blues. This duo never disappoints. I just wish it was longer. Just an excellent album. I leave it with my jaw to the floor.

Key Tracks – The whole damn thing.


20. Zola Jesus – Conatus

Zola makes the best choir in the world sound miniscule in comparison. Her voice is just overwhelmingly loud. It’s beautiful music. Not music to be heard everyday, but she is definitely definitely quite the treat to listen to. Her music is atmospheric, etheral, and romantic. My dream? To put her in the studio with Florence and the Machine. Can you IMAGINE what will happen?

Key Tracks – Vessel, In Your Nature, Swords


19. Rihanna – Talk That Talk

Aaaah yes. RiRi. She has returned. Again, with another set of r&b and dance hits. They hit harder with every album. On this one she definitely explores the club scene a little more than previous efforts as well as the sexual bravado… And her voice fits perfectly with the beats. She’s come a long way from her first album and I look forward to hearing where she takes her music next. “Drunk on Love” has been on repeat on my pod for days.

Key Tracks – Where Have You Been, We Found Love, Drunk on Love, Roc Me Out


18. The Chain Gang of 1974 – Wayward Fire

I’m kinda an 80s junkie, even though I remember the 90s more vividly from beginning to end. This album could easily have been played in heavy rotation in the 80s. It’s a great combination of new wave, rock, and guitars that made the 80s what it was. Plus, it’s a fantastic title for a band no? Chain Gang of 1974. I mean, who DOESN’T love this name??

Key Tracks – Devil is a Lady, Heartbreakin’ Scream, Matter of Time


17. Childish Gambino – Camp

Donald Glover, aka Childish Gambino, is a nerd. And he illustrates that in this album. He illustrates how he grew up, fitting in a world that didn’t necessarily accept him because he wasn’t the stereotypical Black person one sees on tv or the media or in music. He loves his parents, he realizes how lucky he is, and he’s funny. I can kinda relate to that;-) It’s funny, it’s refreshing, and I like it. I hope he sticks around for a long time.

Key Tracks – Bonfire, LES, You See Me


16. Designer Drugs – Hardcore/Softcore


Key Tracks – Leather Gang, Crazy for You, Riot


15. St. Vincent – Strange Mercy

The Shredding Queen on this one… she is an excellent guitarist. It’s a break up record. Or the picking up the pieces after breaking up with someone. It’s quite quirky. It’s beautiful. It’s perfect. Thank you Annie. I could go on and on about this, but I won’t. It’s good. It’s very very good.

Key Tracks – Cruel, Cheerleader, Champagne Year


14. Antigone Rising – 23 Red

The ladies from Long Island, NY, have returned with a very upbeat and incredibly catchy collection of songs of rock and a twang of country. It’s a feel good album that was perfect for the summer whether relaxing at the beach, driving with friends, or doing your best air guitar and air drumming in your living room. The quartet possesses high energy, beautiful melodies, and heartfelt songwriting. It’s a treasure and a must have..

Key Tracks – No Remedy, Everywhere is Home, You Say You Want to Leave (Circles), Gracefully


13. Washed Out – Within and Without

The man is Earnest Green. The album? Beautifully textured and layered. It leaves you with a push and pull between summer lounging and dancing.

Key Tracks – Eyes Be Closed, Far Away, Within and Without, Call it Off


12. Camo and Crooked – Cross the Line

If you like drum and bass, and needle drops, this one is for you. The end:-) Thank me later.

Key Tracks – Funk You, Make the Call, Portal


11. Lisa Bianco – Momentum

The long awaited second cd was worth the wait. The crunchy guitars make you want to jump up and slap yourself, your mom, and the little dog that keeps yapping. She’s loud, bold, and unapologetic. From beginning to the end of this record, you are taken on an emotional ride of hope, love, frustration, and satisfaction. Big thumbs up from me.

Key Tracks – Breakin’, Erase You, Big City Lights, Low


10. Lady Gaga – Born this Way

The Ga doesn’t disappoint on her second full length masterpiece. She returns proving (as if there was any real doubt) that she has the chops, and the right production team behind her to carry her voice into the world. I kinda dig it. More power to her.

Key Tracks – Government Hooker, Marry the Night, Heavy Metal Lover


9. Wild Flag – Wild Flag

This is not a superteam. It’s a combo of great musicians from Helium, the Minders, and Sleater-Kinney, who happen to be friends. They’re in your face, they’re loud, they are awesome. Period. If you listen to Wild Flag, you are left twitching on the floor wanting more of the wails and crunchy sounds of guitarists Mary Timony and Carrie Brownstein. One word to describe it? Incredible.

Key Tracks – Romance, Glass Tambourine, Electric Band


8. The Black Keys – El Camino

The Ohio boys return again for a new album. It mixes garage rock, soul, and a bit more rock edged than Brothers. It’s fast paced and if anyone can make the loud, it’s these two. Dan’s guitar wailing just makes it even MORE worthwhile.

Key Tracks – the whole damn album


7. Swedish House Mafia – Until One

Whaaaat? I can’t hear you!! That is what I usually say when I listen to this album because the beats are so loud and addictive it’s hard to concentrate. The whole album is just wonderful from beginning to end. I turn up the volume and twitch again with glee. The synths make this album and the mix is just perfect. All hail the new Kings!

Key Tracks – the whole album, especially In the Air


6. M83 – Hurry Up, We’re Dreaming

It’s gorgeous, it’s lush it’s 80s revisited just on a grander dance scale. It’s a great gem to the ears.

Key Tracks – Intro, Midnight City, Claudia Lewis, Year One, One UFO


5. Mute Math – Odd Soul

Cheesus Crust I love this album. It’s loud, unapologetic, rocky, melodic.. the adjectives can go on and on. They really upped the ante with this album. And it shows. The production is sleek in some  areas and distorted in others. But yet it completely works. This could easily have been played in the 70s and they could have easily opened for Led Zep in LZ’s heyday The lead singer, Paul Meany, shouts like he found himself some religion and wants to share. It’s just a beautiful work of art to dance to. Get on the good foot, and get this album.

Key Tracks – Aliens, Odd Soul, Equals, Pyrtania


4. Betty Wright w. the Roots – Betty Wright: The Movie

Betty returns from a ten year hiatus with a wonderful r&b album with the Roots in tow. The production is completely old school for the most part, and there is nothing wrong with a little old school. Her voice hasn’t skipped a beat. While there are a few guest stars on the cd (Lil Wayne and Joss Stone), Wright is still in control, singing about happiness, heartbreak, and maturity. R&B singers of today should take a page from Betty’s book. They could learn a thing or two.

Key Tracks – Whisper in the Wind, Grapes on a Vine, So Long, So Wrong, In the Middle of the Game


3. Florence and the Machine – Ceremonials

Well, Florence and the gang returns. Her vocals are as bold as ever, accompanied by organs and drums. You get the feeling that you are listening to hymnals but you only WISH church hymns were as exciting as Florence makes them sound.  She’s empowering, elegant, and at times completely melancholy and dramatic. But all the while ALWAYS entertaining. And she’s only 24.

Key Tracks – Shake it Out, What the Water Gave Me, Breaking Down, Seven Devils


2. Lupe Fiasco – Lasers

For a man who didn’t want this album to be released due to record company interference, this was a stellar set. Lupe writes about triumph over tragedy, fighting for what is yours, problems within inner cities, and the government, while maintaining his own sanity and dealing with his place in life and in music. It is quite a feat to take on, and Lupe does it tremendously well. This was quite the stand out, in a year where rap music was in major yawnapalooza. Thank you Lupe, thank you.

Key Tracks – Words I Never Said, Till I Get There, The Show Goes On, Break the Chain, All Black Everything (a particular gem, where he creates a fantasy of what ifs..)


1. TIE. Friendly Fires – Pala; Adele – 21

Before you say it, yeah I have a tie for #1. I love these albums equally. Friendly Fires saved my summer with an upbeat, dancey, r&b influenced collection of songs that got the butt shaking and  the brush in my hand doubled as the best mic in the world to sing along to their music. It is the best pop dance album this year hands down. And Adele, well.. when you can convey heartbreak as powerful and emotional as Adele can, you are most definitely.. winning. Her voice is just stunning, absolutely stunning and tugs at the heart strings like nothing else I’ve heard this year. This was her year, as it should have been. Perfect mix of soul, emotion, and pop. FF and Adele delivered in two different ways, but equally just as effective, to me anyways.

Key TracksFriendly Fires’ Pala: Show Me Lights, Hurting, Pala, Live Those Days Tonight, Blue Cassette

Adele’s 21: Rollin’ in the Deep, Someone Like You, Rumour Has It, Set Fire to the Rain, Take it All, I’ll be Wating


Aaand a little round of applause for the ones who JUST missed my list but deserve a serious shout out:

Fucked Up – David Comes to Life

Feist – Metals

DJ Shadow – The Less  You Know, the Better

The Roots – Undun

Yuck. Yes there is a band called Yuck. And they’re not yuck. not in the least.

Kelly Clarkson – Stronger. Gotta love the pop. The sweet sweet pop. #TeamClarkson

Whew. That was a LOT of music to narrow down to 30 choices. My ears hurt. My brain hurts. But if next year is anything like this year, then I’m definitely looking forward to it. I’m going to have some wine and listen to these albums again.

Rock on everyone. Happy new year.


Randomness is at Order. – Podcast 8. Come and get it!

Lots and lots of randomness in today’s podcast folks. I don’t know.. felt like sharing. And if you are annoyed by the lack of knife distributions at restaurants, then this is the show for you. No theme this week. I was just too tired but I still gave you all songs that you can talk amongst yerselves about until the next one. All killer, never filler. Yup. Enjoy…

As usual, copy and paste THIS —>

Here is the tracklisting. Yup, I told you it’s completely random. Click on the image for a bigger looksee.

1. Moby – James Bond Remixed Theme

2. Fishbone – Skankin’ to the Beat

3. September – Party in My Head

4. The Bangles – Walk Like an Egyptian

5. Boogie Down Productions – South Bronx

6. Teena Marie – Lovergirl

7. Katy Perry – E.T.

8. Morcheeba – Easier Said than Done

9. Holy Fuck – Echo Sam

10. Live – I Alone

11. Jamie Cullum – I Get a Kik Out of You

12. Karen Elson – The Ghost Who Walks

13. Washed Out – Eyes Be Closed

14. Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings – I Learned the Hard Way

15. Freelance Whales – Hannah

16. Eagle Eye Cherry – Shooting Up in Vain

17. The Monkees – Salesman

19. Simply Red – Money’s Too Tight to Mention

20. Everything But the Girl – Mirrorball (Remix)

21. Bobby Caldwell – What You Won’t Do For Love

22. Rage Against the Machine – Sleep Now in the Fire

Listen Hard.


Another Show for the Record Books – Memorial Day Edition

Hello fellow music heads,

Here’s another poddy.. in before Memorial Day. As Napoleon Dynamite says, YESSSSSS.. You know the drill. I decided to throw some 90s nuggets in because it was really my favorite decade for music. I wish I could have included more, but that means the podcast would last foreeevaaah. I’d still be recording as I type. So I tried to include songs I really really love. It’s just a small representation. I loved a lot of 90s songs. I loved how random so many bands were.. just as many as there were that sounded exaaaactly like each other. As always, I played the oldies with some new goodies which I hope you enjoy too. Still trying to get used to this podcast thing, still working out the bugs with adjusting. But all in all, I hope you enjoy. Be patient with me. You know what to do.

Copy the link:

Download away

And here’s a list:

Click on the pic to get a better view…

See anyone you remember..hmmmmmmm?

It was fun strolling down memory lane. As you can see, it was quite the mixture. Hope you enjoy.

Happy Memorial Day weekend. Keep rockin’..

Intro: Moby: James Bond Theme Remixed

1. Friendly Fires – Kiss of Life

2. Soundgarden – Fell on Black Days

3. Against Me! – Borne on the FM Waves of the Heart

4. The New Radicals – You Get What You Give

5. Avril Lavigne – Losing Grip

6. The Decemberists – Eli, The Barrowboy

7. Social Distortion – Story of My Life

8. The Hold Steady – Rock Problems

9. Sir Mix-a-Lot – Posse on Broadway

10. X-Ray Spex – I Live Off You

11. Coolio – Gangsta’s Paradise

12. Clinic – The Vulture

13. Mary J. Blige – You Bring Me Joy

14. The Monkees – She Hangs Out

15. TLC – Creep

16. Hypernova – Viva La Resistance

17. Seal – Crazy

18. Colette – Think You Want It

19. Billie Ray Martin – Your Loving Arms

20. The Black Keys – Next Girl

21. Snow – Inofrmer

22. I Blame Coco – Playwright Fate

23. Snap – I Got the Power

24. Linkin Park – Waiting for the End

That’s a wrap…

You can follow me on twitter… @joelygabs if you are interested in rants, musings, ravings, and observations about life in general.


Podcast #5, The Rapture Edition

Alright folks,

Here’s another one for the record books. We survived. Yipee. You know the drill. Highlight, copy, paste, download. Enjoy. Heaven is awesome.. I guess. At least we have music.

Aaaaand here’s the lineup. Aaand the pitch.

To see a bigger version of the list, click on the pic.

1. Moby – James Bond Theme Remixed

2. The Kills – Heart is a Beating Drum

3. Janet Jackson – Black Cat

4. Jane Child – Don’t Wanna Fall in Love (Teddy Riley Remix)

5. Michelle Malone – Travelin’ and Unravelin’

6. Lisa Bianco – Charmed

7. Erykah Badu – On & On

8. Bee vs. Moth – Salisbury Steakhouse

9. Adele – Cold Shoulder (Remix)

10. Journey – Wheels in the Sky

11. 20-22’s – Talk to Me

12. Eric B. and Rakim – I Ain’t No Joke

13. Yim Yames – My Sweet Lord

14. XTC – Day in Day Out

15. Hudson Mohawke – Rising 5

16. Judas Priest – Hell Bent for Leather

17. Excuse 17 – Designated Shutgun

18. Joss Stone – You Had Me

19. Fleetwood Mac – Gold Dust Woman

20. Jawbox – Breathe

21. Polyamorous Affair – Bright One

22. Telekenesis- I Got You

23. Howard Jones – No One Is to Blame

24. Cracker – Low

The fustercluck That’s “The Grammys.”

Hello music lovers.

Ok, so I’ve given you all enough time to let this past Sunday’s award show that I’ve lovingly called “The Crappys” aka “The Grammys” mull around in your noggins for a bit. There were a few surprises, and one particular “You gotta be fucking kidding me” from yours truly. But let me just review what the Grammys will NEVER do. Maybe this will ease the mind of the troubled music fanatic like myself.

The Crappy’s will NEVER:

1. Give big awards to rappers.

2. Give big awards to teeny boppers.

3. Give big awards to people who use the word “Fuck” in the title of their song.

4. Give big awards to the controversial.

5. Give big awards to attention seekers.

So all the little fans of Justin Beiber, the bigger older Cee-Lo fans, Eminem fans, Jay-Z fans, Lil’ Wayne fans, Jonas Brothers fans, etc will NEVER see them get at the very least a Record of the Year award. I find it funny they can’t give a well deserved big name award to Eminem. They don’t deem him worthy.

BUT bitch has an Oscar. So IN YOUR FACE Grammys.

The Crappys isn’t about who’s popular for a win column. Yes they do NOMINATE what is heard on the radio but let’s face it. The Crappys love old people and people who actually can sing OR somewhat stay out of trouble and are likable with not much of a voice. The Crappys like people who are performers. Not auto tuned messes. Not rappers. And not the teeny boppers with the exception of Taylor Swift who well..she’s blonde or somewhat blonde (check those roots people). The only reason WHY they even nominated any of those aforementioned genres was to draw the young viewers in to watch. You hear that Beiberheads..they don’t care about you. They just want you to watch!! But as a whole you could pretty much predict how the way of the land went that night. It’s actually pretty funny. The Grammys also go with the “safe choice” for big wins. I will never forget..maybe it was 92..I think. Digable Planets won best rap album, beating out Dr. Dre’s The Chronic. Now for a youngster like me, I dug DP but come on, Dre was ALLLL over the tube and the radio that particular year. Still though Dre isn’t someone you can play around your parents. Digable Planets were. So they were pretty much a shoe in there. Now fast forward so many years to this one. Digable Planets have been replaced by Lady Antebellum. And the upset for Best Rap album has now been replaced by Song and Album of the Year. I enjoy LA’s music I do. It’s  solid cd full of crossover pop/country hits that young and old can enjoy. No problem there. But to win TWO of the biggies. That makes no sense. It just doesn’t. There were much more deserving bands. Even LA didn’t know what to think of the wins. I know what to think: SAFELY CHOSEN. No controversy with this group. No one is in rehab. No one uses auto tuning. No one is walking in the band with crotchless pants. They’re sweet. And let us not forget last year’s clusterfuck of Taylor Swift’s wins. Again. Sweetness. And safe. Non controversial.

Every few years or so, the Crappys give an award to a “who the fuck is THAT?” nominee. You know, the one that leaves you with a scratching head and tilted head from going, I have NO idea who that is. This goes to Esperanza Spalding. The lady with the big ass fro and the jazz. I had heard of her prior to the nomination. But I didn’t think she would win, much like everyone else in this country who watched. I personally was SURE Florence and the Machines were going to win. I didn’t think Bieber stood a chance and neither did Drake. That kind of narrows the competition and really Florence in my mind STILL should have won. Drake has plenty of chances to be nominated in the future, although two years form now there will be another Justin wannabe. And the same thing will happen to him. And tears of pain will be heard throughtout the land. And if you heard a big boom that night, it was the sound of my mouth hitting the floor at Esperanza Spalding’s win. Only the Grammys. But I’ll be honest. I’m glad Justin didn’t win. No teeny bopper SHOULD win. Primarily because say 7 times out of ten they will disappear with the few exceptions.

Arcade Fire’s surprise win for Album of the Year proves that the voters do know in some respects good from bad. I think it was a HUGE push for indie music. You know, they’re the little band that could if you will. So that is a step in the right direction. Maybe AF can carry the torch.. and give the Popheads something else to listen to. Although their first performance was insane and gave me a headache. Flickering lights, a bmx bicyclist and people jumping did not play over with me too well. Now the ENDING song, yes. That’s a winner. I was still humming it the next day. Very catchy. Very easy. Nothing too complicated. Don’t you wish all music wasn’t complicated. But then again, that’s what keeps it interesting right? Right.

And let me say, Cee-Lo. The outfit. The bird. I didn’t know if Morris Day was going to break out with “The Bird” or if he was going to perform with Elton John in a Donald Duck outfit again. Seeing him do the bird with Morris Day would have been MUCH more entertaining then toothpick Gweneth Paltrow on stage. Really.. that was just a mess. Cee-Lo was on point as usual, but GP was just a hot mess. Climbing on the piano and crawling to him does NOT make her Michelle Pfeiffer in the Fabulous Baker Boys. It was one of those Yaaaaay/Naaaaaaaaaay moments. Cee-Lo: excellent GP: major fail. stick to starving yourself and acting sweetie, k? K. Leave the singing to the hubby PLEAAAASE.

So. Thustly. In conclusion. If you are a thug, a druggie, a rapper, a jailbird, a lip syncher, an auto tuner, or a screamer (not THAT kind of screamer) chances are you won’t win a dang thing. So if you keep in mind with everything I just stated, you should be able to figure out who will victorious.

But. It IS an honor just to be nominated.